Character

Thinking About, 

One of the identifying features of someone is its character. A person is a character on the stage of life. Mannerisms, expressions and speech mold the individual who is then directed by circumstances. My question is, who is the creator of the circumstances?  Is it the individual, or the society in which he or she survives?

            I belong to the esoteric school of life that teaches, ‘as a man thinketh, so shall he be’. I do not come to this school without a primary education. My character was in part shaped by the teachings of the Catholic Church.

            The Baltimore Catechism formed much of my early character when I was in first grade with the questions, “Who is God?" The memorized response was, “God is the Supreme Being who made all things”. This was followed with, “Who made you?" “God made me”, and then, “Why did God make you?” The response was, “to know, love and serve Him in this life and the next”.

            The basic foundation of this creed, along with my family’s influence prepared the first stage for my life’s performances. My role in Act One was with the awareness that somewhere in the vast audience, God was watching me. He would know if I was serving Him and if I wasn’t, I could be doomed to hell. Confession on Saturday, granting me absolution of my sins guaranteed I would perform my part as taught.

            It wasn’t until characters outside my family and church made their entrance on the stage that I learned my role could be molded by my own instincts. My performance did not alter much. I retained the essence of the character through Act One, my growth and development years, and most of Act Two, marrying and raising my family in the basic traditions of my faith.

            It was during the last scene of Act Two that a revelation came upon me. Slowly, almost imperceptibly, a new awareness crept onto the stage hovering just beyond the footlights, as if waiting for me to acknowledge its presence while whispering cues that were not in the original script.

            “There is more to life than what you think." “You have a dual nature, one physical, the other spiritual.” Life is not only what you see, feel, touch, hear, and smell, it is also what you intuit; You are not your body, it is merely a costume that you wear”.

            Gradually the cues became louder, more frequent, and by the time I entered Act Three, the awareness had engulfed me and become the focal point of my character. My life changed as new thoughts and beliefs took over directing and shaping the role I portrayed.

            It was then that my costars, my husband, and children took over leads in their own dramas. Now and then I played a minor role but always shifted back to my own theater of action. Some of the leading characters exited my life forever and remain only in my memory. The essence of their spirits still patterns the framework of my heart.         

            Breaking with the traditional religious philosophy of my life was not difficult once I realized that the foundation of Christianity had been rooted in the esoteric belief of Unity. 

               “The Father and I are One!” (John 10:30)  “Who has seen me, has seen the Father”. (John 14:9)

       The revelation of who I am finally descended. The awesomeness of it staggered my mind. The truth of it was not to be denied. The responsibility was overpowering. I was not only made in the ‘image and likeness of God’ (another precept from the Baltimore Catechism) but the spirit of God was in me, not only in me but is me.  I realized the universality of everything. All that is, is God.

            This ultimate truth created scenarios of life that at first I refused to believe. If all that is, is God, then Hitler would have been God. Cruel and almost inhumane entities would have been God. I didn’t want to accept this ideology. How could the loving God that I knew be within a being of hatred?

            It was when I recalled the whispered cues from beyond the footlights, “you have a dual nature, one physical and the other spiritual”, that the truth came upon me. The spirit of God is our essence. The power of God is within. How we use that power is determined by our physical nature. We can choose to use it for good or evil. It is our free will.

            Once I understood the validity of ‘free will’, and the magnitude of the power within, my physical and spiritual identities merged forming a new character that creates the dramas and directs the actions.

            This is the role I now play as I move within the third act. I am fully aware that my actions are based upon my perceptions. What I think is indeed what I am. It is with this in mind that I accept that I am the writer, producer, director and star in my personal drama of life. I am the creator of my character.

            I recall the words of William James:

            “I have often thought that the best way to define a man’s character would be to seek out the particular mental or moral attitude in which, when it came upon him, he felt himself most deeply and intensely active and alive. At such moments there is a voice inside which speaks and says, “This is the real me!”